Daily Archives: January 22, 2013

Shining Moments

In order to adopt I had to do two things.

First, I had to let go of my longing for security.

and trust that God would provide

somehow

someway.

I remember being at the airport and walking towards the

gate for all those boarding the Washington,DC to Moscow flight.

Heart in throat

‘this is it’ feeling.

I turned for one last glimpse of my family

gave a final wave and stepped out of their sight.

Down the long ramp

and into the plane.

Out of myself and into His Love.

My heart was already numb with pain

my mind was still sorting out questions

but my will was focused on God’s Will.

Seeking to follow Him whatever the cost.

Alone

I walked carrying my suitcase filled

baby clothes

and a small pink baby blanket.

Adoption in and by itself would not have moved me

to step onto the plane that evening

and fly over the ocean.

No, it was a little face with serious, sad eyes.

That picture burned within my soul a reason.

I went to get her

and to follow Him.

Fears mounted within me as I heard the door closed

and the plane began to move.

Like Issac on the altar

I sat in my seat and closed my eyes

and prayed for God to keep us all safe.

Through the night sky we flew.

The hardest step had been made.

That verse came to mind

Whosoever finds his life will lose it, and whosoever loses his life for my sake

     will find it. Matt. 10:39

 

Letting go of the known, the safe

freed me to receive LIFE….so much more of life.

Yes, I was a happy as everyone else when I stepped onto American soil

a few days later

but

deep within my heart I knew His keeping Presence

in a way that I never could have known it staying here.

Again and again I glimpse that truth.

We must let go

in order to receive.

Are you holding onto anything today?

Give it to Jesus and discover how wonderfully He cares for you.

Yes, as the old song goes,

His eyes is on the sparrow

and I know

yes, I know

He cares for you.